Holy Pedagogical Days (A Lesson In Progress)

Weird ChristmasI’m teaching AP World History for the first time this year, and it’s been… a fascinating challenge.

Fortunately, I’ve been in and around the world of AP and Pre-AP for nearly two decades, and I’m blessed to know several amazing APWH teachers and consultants – all of whom share generously and encourage unceasingly. There’s more of a learning curve than I care to admit, but that doesn’t mean I don’t enjoy it immensely.

Most days.

I have 93 students spread out over four sections. (I know, right? Fewer than a hundred kids on my roster – I didn’t think such things were possible.) I’m surrounded by experienced teachers who are supportive but see little reason to tiptoe when it comes to asking questions or making observations – my kinda people. My district has been struggling, at least according to those widely publicized test scores the state keeps pushing, but I see its heart and the talent gathered here, and I am at home.

Takin’ It To Dilemma

It’s in that context that I periodically find myself in something of a philosophical dilemma. See, AP is by design a more-or-less college level course. It certainly moves at a ridiculous pace, and students are responsible for an insane amount of information – most of which they’re expected to read, view, or otherwise digest on their own so we can focus on critical thinking, document analysis, and other essential skills in class. That’s without a doubt been the number one challenge for both them and me – keeping up with the content. It feels some weeks like I’ve left them to learn the material all on their own while I torture them in class with things like making good inferences or identifying points of view. 

For most of them, this is their first AP class of any kind. I have a handful of juniors and seniors, but the bulk of my darlings are freshmen and sophomores. Many are strong enough students coming in, but plenty of others signed up primarily to qualify for one of the eleventeen different flavors of high school diploma the state delineates; several require advanced coursework to get the shiny sticker at the bottom. There’s no Pre-AP program here to speak of – yet – so this is in many ways a whole new world for them.

That gives us something in common, at least.

Thus my philosophical dilemma. Yes, – it’s a college-level course. Yes, there’s a big ol’ scary AP Exam coming up sooner than it seems. I absolutely want to do everything in my power to push them to their lil’ limits, prepare them for the exam, and lay the groundwork for them to do well in subsequent AP or other advanced classes, and in college, and in life. It is without a doubt time to don their big kid panties and suck it up – we’re in HIGH. SCHOOL. NOW.

But see, that’s just it – they’re in high school now. Not college, not a career, not the post-secondary something or other for which we’re trying to prepare them. High school. Getting ready for those things, but not yet doing those things.

Therein lies the dilemma. Every teacher faces it in some form or another – sometimes daily. How much do I push, and how much do I bend? When do I draw hard lines, figuring that’s what’s best for my little cherubs in the long run, and when do I adjust based on the situation, the need, the individual, hesitating to put the rules ahead of the relationships?

It’s tricky even if we set aside the touchy-feely stuff. Sure, I love them dearly most days, and that’s part of the gig, but the answers don’t suddenly become clear when we prioritize the purely academic aspects of the equation. I know they need to practice independent reading and note-taking skills; they beg for questions, outlines, or something I can give them on paper so they’ll know what content matters most. I organize interactive small-group discussions and activities, which work well enough; they want me to lecture more and insist it helps them understand stuff when they’re later reading on their own.

We’re starting formal written arguments in a few weeks, but we’ve also colored. We’re still digging through primary source texts, but today we watched a musical parody video about the Black Death as a self-check on content (if you understand all of the references, you’re probably good to go on the Plague; if not, you might need to brush up). I have no idea if I’m doing it all “right,” but I’m genuinely trying to balance the demands and guiding purpose of the course with the dynamics and practical limitations of my kids – and sometimes myself.

And that’s OK. It has to be. (Whatever you’re doing is too, by the way. Those folks on the tweeter-blogs making sweeping pronouncements about what should or shouldn’t be done in every classroom for every kid in every situation can kiss my curriculum. Lay off the pompous teacher-shaming and go flip your classroom or something. Sorry, do I sound bitter?)

The Mayans and Groundhog Day

It’s in that spirit that I’m trying something stupid this week. Or brilliant. Maybe both. I finally snagged a classroom set of laptops for classroom use, and we’re going to break up the routine for a few days.

I’m giving my students a list of major and semi-major holidays from which to choose, and an organizational table to complete as they research each. While a few are uniquely American, most have roots much further back in history and have evolved over the centuries. Students will explore those roots and that evolution, zoom in on some of the rituals or customs associated with each, and – here’s the World History Part – try to make sense of it all in relation to the cultures from whence they sprang,

If the AP gods smile upon us, they’ll also be able to trace how some of these rituals and customs have evolved from century to century and place to place. Presumably those changes reflect aspects of the times and places in which they occur. A secondary goal is to determine the reliability of various online sources for this sort of thing – holiday legends tend to be ripe with after-the-fact sentimentality and artificial OMG. 

I know, I know – it sounds a little elementary on the surface. I’m hoping I’ve structured it enough so that it’s not. It has the potential to be ultra-productive – both in terms of engagement and in making connections between customs and cultures, between history and traditions. Not to go all crazy or anything, but what if they’re able to identify change and continuity over time, similarities and differences between cultures, or other baby steps towards legit historical skills and AP-level thinking?! LET THE LEARNING BEGIN!!!

Or, this might very well waste two hours of their lives they’ll never get back. That’s also a very real possibility.

On Day Two, they’ll be given the option to compare and contrast two of the holidays in terms of the information they’ve gathered in some yet-to-be-determined format, OR to compose for publication an article / blog post about one of their chosen holidays. I may offer a third option of simply adding a few more holidays for students who may not have more than that to give at this point; just between you and me, I’m waiting to see how Day One goes before finalizing that part.

I’m hoping many of them try the blog post / article. Like with the initial tables, there are guidelines and requirements and hoops through which to jump, but I’ve tried to leave them some creative freedom on exactly how to do it. I realize that edu-bloggers far more popular than I would insist in stuffy tones that I shouldn’t crush students’ personal learning journeys with things like word counts or formatting expectations, but I’ve met them and with all due respect, sometimes fences often set us free.

Assuming it actually happens, my plan is to then post the results for you and anyone else I can virtually round up to read and offer comments – good stuff, bad stuff, thoughts and suggestions, etc. I’m pretty sure that’s a trendy edu-thing to do these days – “authentic audiences” and all that – but mostly I just think it would be nifty keen and get them a better variety of feedback than I could provide alone.

Thanks in advance for helping with that, by the way. I’ll let you know when they’re posted.

Reflections

I have no idea what to expect. As I type this, I should already be showering and on my way. With my writing time so limited these days, I’m often trading pithy commentary for pedagogical transparency and personal reflection. Hopefully some of you will find my periodic bewilderment and perpetual self-doubt either comforting or amusing in some way.

I certainly do.

I’ll post the actual instructions soon and let you know how it goes. In the meantime, Comments are always welcome below – except for you bots at the essay-writing service or selling the Russian sex dolls. Seriously, people – I don’t have time to monitor that stuff right now!

On that note, go change the world. Thanks for staying with me on this ride. You are needed, now more than ever.

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Weird Silence

Dewey Really Believe This?It’s funny the things that make us uncomfortable.

Not, like, in general. It’s not funny that snakes make me uncomfortable, or anyone messing with someone else’s eyeballs. Hair anywhere other than someone’s head. Dogs in the backs of moving pickup trucks. Those things should make anyone uncomfortable.

But it’s weird what can make us uncomfortable in our classrooms. One of them happened to me today.

It’s been a wild start. I wrote previously about trying to “hit the ground running,” which we did. Friday was all photos and orientations and policy manuals. Monday was a shortened schedule so kids could view the eclipse (yes, we used funny glasses). Tuesday was a “late start day” for meetings and then “Bonus Hour” in the afternoon and a special “close reading” activity and boy-howdy was I relieved when I realized we’d finally have THREE DAYS IN A ROW on the same schedule to finish out this week!  

See, man learned to use tools... or, in this case, to hit bones with other bones, which seems much less impressive.In the midst of the chaos, we’ve introduced “World History” and what it means to add “AP” to the beginning. I’ve crammed in a few lectures, some jigsaw reading, a pretty big discussion about foundational themes – all while trying to get to know my kids enough to be effective in a new subject in a new place in a new reality stream.

Yesterday, I introduced an assignment I knew might take them a while. See, at some point, if you’re going to learn history, you have to start learning some history.

I’ll let that sink in.

I love creative teaching strategies and movement and interaction, and yes, I let one class talk me into showing “The Mesopotamians” music video after they’d been particularly productive. But eventually one of two things has to happen if kids are going to learn world history. Either I’m going to need to tell them stuff they need to know about world history – probably with visuals projected on a big screen in some way – or they’re going to need to read stuff about world history – probably from a book or article I’ve provided.

It’s that latter option which led to the weird, uncomfortable thing.

See, we busted out our textbooks for the first time yesterday – but late in the hour, when they barely had time to admire the large, consistent subheadings and svelte incorporation of maps and graphs. Today, I gave them most of the hour to read through the chapter and figure out what parts seem important before beginning this nifty, artsy-fartsy assignment I chose mostly because I think it’s pedagogically sound at this point with these kids, but partly because I have a huge classroom with very bare walls and I think the results will look both academically impressive and decorative. 

Judge me, baby – I will not apologize. *throws arms open and head back, waiting*

So after some introductory things and a recap of goals and expectations for the assignment, I sat down and… let them work. I had to start figuring out the online grade book and enter some assignments from earlier in the week. I’d also planned on looking over next week’s content when I realized…

It was silent in my room. Eerie creepy quiet, in the wrongest sort of way.

Thank god I’m a weathered veteran, or I might have bolted right then. Instead, I forced myself to maintain a detached, pseudo-disinterested facade as I casually surveyed the situation.

Eye SurgeryMy ears eventually picked up the subtle scribbling of little mechanical pencils, and the periodic turning of pages. After what must have been seventeen or eighteen hours, a young lady leaned over to her tablemate and pointed to something in the text, whispering an apparent inquiry. Her cohort considered whatever she’d said, then nodded and gave a brief response which seemed to satisfy her. They both then continued doing this… this… horrifying “old way” schoolness.

I considered clarifying that it was OK for them to work together, including actual speech if necessary, but I knew they already knew that. And they were collaborating, at least here and there. So instead I took a casual stroll around the room, answering a few questions of the sort apparently important enough to ask when I pass into their “inquiry zone,” but which hadn’t merited a trip all the way to my desk or the labor of raising an entire hand.

It seemed they were all on task. Some were more productive than others, of course, but they were by and large playing school. So I did something crazy.

I sat down and entered some grades, then started reading up on the Classical Period of China in Chapter Three.

And that was perfectly OK. Productive, even.

The weird part is that for several minutes, this made me feel guilty. I was afraid someone might walk by and see what was happening and judge me – a fear having nothing to do with my very supportive and sensible co-workers and everything to do with reading too many education books and blogs.

Trust Fall - the heavy guy has to have LOTS more trust than the others.If you’ve taught for any length of time, you’ve endured endless PD days, videos, handouts, faculty presentations, and perhaps even a horrible skit or two, built around three basic assumptions: (a) all teachers used to suck in every possible way, providing endless “before” examples, (b) most current teachers have no idea how to work with young people and probably don’t even like them very much, usually because of our cultural insensitivity, and (c) if we don’t embrace {insert trendy strategy here}, we’ll continue to suck and most likely destroy the future.

It’s much more pronounced on social media. The blogs, the chats, the #irritweeting platitudes. Somehow, the worst offenders seem to always have 28.6K followers and a new book you should buy.

“Classrooms don’t have to be quiet all of the time. If I come to your room and it’s loud, I won’t scold you – I’ll congratulate you!”

“We need to be the guide on the side, not the sage on the stage!”

“Whoever’s doing all the work is doing all the learning. If you exert the least bit of effort in preparing or implementing a lesson, you’re stuck in the Dark Ages of mimeograph machines and overhead projectors!”

Ironically, there are some pretty hard and fast doctrines generally accompanying these “revolutionary” ideas. Kids should be in charge of everything related to their education – content, methodology, evaluation, location, etc. – from about age four through their first Master’s Degree. Teachers who lecture or use Powerpoint in any context or for any purpose are the Devil’s Pedagogues. “Relationships” are more important than content or structure or pedagogy or pedigree, reading or writing or math – after all, they don’t care how much you know until you stop lighting stuff on fire in buckets and embrace starfish as they learn grit by celebrating failure, thus leaving two sets of footprints in the sand.

Honestly, it may be rooted in good intentions, but it gets a bit judgey. Most religions do when they stray from their central purpose.

ToolboxSo I’d like to assure all of the baby teachers out there, and remind some of the veterans, that all instructional and classroom management advice – the pedagogy, the brain research, the anecdotes, the activities – are (or should be) about giving you ideas. Options. Tools. Challenging you, or inspiring you. Maybe shaking you up or forcing you to question how you do things from time to time.

They’re not divine revelations. Flipped classrooms are a cool idea that work for many teachers in many circumstances; they’re not carved into stone tablets that Moses posted online for the Israelites to view as many times as necessary at home and ask questions about during the assembling of the people. Close reading strategies are good for many kids in many situations, and most of us could stand to be a bit more intentional about stuff like this, but they’re not silver bullets, no matter what that sample class from New Jersey did in that video. Even Socratic Circles or Inquiry-Based Anything sometimes work and sometimes don’t – that’s what keeps teaching interesting.

If you’re boring the crap out of your kids with droning lectures, then stop. If you’re ossifying their little brains with book work and worksheets, then you really do suck – you’re the guy in those horrible anecdotes they use to justify torturing the rest of us. And if you don’t actually like your kids… dude – go sell shoes or something. Less stress, more money.

Granny ClassroomQuestion your methods, absolutely. Challenge your perceived results. Be transparent with your co-workers in considering ways to be more effective. Don’t be insecure and stuck in the mythical, dark “ancient ways.”

But if you’re doing your best to figure out what works for you and your kids, and that involves a lecture or two, then you go, girl. If you require kids to occasionally sit down and crunch some content, do so without shame or apologies. You may even sporadically find use in multiple choice quizzes or a *gasp* movie or two.

“Old school” is not a synonym for “failure.” Neither is “direct instruction,” “hard deadlines,” or “quantitative assessment.” Progress is doing what works for your kids in your classroom in your reality. If you’re doing that, you don’t owe anyone an apology and have no need to make excuses. Buy that teacher book because it motivates you; not because it shames you. You’re already awesome, and many of you are working miracles in a fallen, stupid world. For totes realsies. Thank God you’re doing what you do, every day, so damn well.

Even if your classroom is, you know… occasionally a bit too quiet.

HP Teachers

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Facts-Only History

Just The Facts

Good morning, class. Today begins the roughly three days we have allotted by our state-mandated curriculum to cover the causes, major events, and impact of the American Civil War. 

Unlike past units in which I’ve sometimes been guilty of inflicting my personal opinions and interpretations on your instead of just teaching you history, I’ll be making every effort to present the facts and only the facts. Evaluation, analysis, synthesis, or conclusions are entirely up to you. We’ve practiced these skills through structured activities, and you already, no doubt, supplement my unwittingly biased and inadequate methods via long, meaningful discussions with your parents and/or clergy, as well as extensive research of your own. Hopefully that will mitigate some of the ongoing damage I’ve done as a bumbling, leftist, possibly atheistic public school educator out to destroy American values.  

It’s not my job to teach you what to think, after all – just to present everything that’s ever happened anywhere in or to our great nation in more or less chronological order without prioritization or unnecessary commentary. 

Countdown to Civil War

The 1850s: Countdown to Civil War

In 1850, the U.S. census showed a population of 23,191,876. 

In 1840 – 17,063,353. 

In 1830 – 12,866,020. 

In 1820 – 9,638,453. 

In 1810 – 7,239,881. 

Rather than me inflict my personal interpretations on which elements of this growth were significant, I refer you to the U.S. Census Bureau for more details and to several biased-but-comprehensive overviews of U.S. History which you may read in order to make up your own mind. 

Compromise of 1850On January 29, 1850, Henry Clay proposed the Compromise of 1850 to Congress. It was a collection of five bills he said would help prevent further conflict between the North and the South. Texas gave up its claims to New Mexico and other areas north of the Missouri Compromise line and the U.S. took over their remaining debts. California was admitted to the Union as a free state. Utah and New Mexico would enter the U.S. under the principal of ‘popular sovereignty’ – meaning the people in each would vote for whether or not to have slavery. The slave trade, but not slavery itself, was banned in the District of Columbia. A much tougher Fugitive Slave Act was enacted. 

The North is generally perceived to have responded badly to the Fugitive Slave Act, which the South generally favored. I’ll refrain from elaborating further for fear I’d be injecting my own interpretations and biases into the matter. It’s not my job to tell you what to think, just to teach you history!

President Z. TaylorPresident Zachary Taylor died unexpectedly in July of 1850 of what seemed to be a stomach-related illness. Some suggested he may have been assassinated by pro-slavery southerners, and various theories have persisted into modern times. In 1991, Taylor’s body was exhumed and tests were done in an effort to determine whether or not he had, in fact, been poisoned. The science found no evidence of malicious behavior, but some question the results even today. 

In an effort to avoid telling you what to believe, I’ll avoid further commentary, possibly having already said too much in favor of something as unsettled as medical science and wishing to give fair and equal treatment to every possible interpretation or theory related to this issue. You are encouraged to devote months of your life to researching the chemistry involved, the nature of the various organizations who’ve published opinions, and the history of Presidential assassination on your own in order to develop your own enlightened viewpoints free from my corrupting influence.  

President M. FillmoreOn July 10, 1850, Millard Fillmore was sworn into office as the 13th President of the United States. Neither expansionists nor slave-holders were generally happy with his publicly stated policies regarding slavery, although it would be wrong of me to try to speak for them or evaluate their reasoning. 

On September 9, 1850, the Compromise of 1850 is passed – see previous elaboration, in which I’ve tried to be fair to all sides. I hope, by mentioning it again here I’m not unjustly suggesting it was more or less important than any other event, or that certain parts of it were good or bad or had any particular impact. Those sorts of discussions are best left to the family hearth.  

P.T. BarnumOn September 11, P.T. Barnum introduced Jenny Lind to American audiences. Often called the “Swedish Nightingale,” Lind was a soprano who performed in Sweden and across Europe before her wildly popular concert tour of America. She donated many of her earnings to charities, especially the endowment of free schools in Sweden. Some people think that sort of philanthropy is noble; others find it less so. Best we not consider such issues here. Or the role of the arts in influencing culture or character.

Too subjective. 

While it is possible that Miss Lind’s singing success was unrelated to the outbreak of the Civil War nearly a decade later, it’s not my place to decide what events are or are not important; I’m paid to merely present the facts

Then again, we’d better pick up the pace… 

In May of 1851, the U.S. participated in the opening ceremony of the first World’s Fair in Hyde Park, London. 

America's Cup YachtOn August 22, 1851, a yacht named “America” won the first America’s Cup yach race, as things named “America” always should. This may have had an impact on different segments of the nation, or it may not have.

It would require an extensive study of available primary sources presenting various points of view in order to give a balanced interpretation regarding such an impact, or lack thereof. By my estimates that would require at least two weeks of class time, which the state-mandated curriculum does not allow. I will therefore abstain from projecting potentially slanted summaries of the nation’s reaction or speculating as to the impact or lack thereof this event may have had on the subsequent outbreak of war. 

I fear we’re running short on time, so I’m going to condense a bit and hope you’re still getting enough to understand what caused the American Civil War. 

November 1851 – Herman Melville’s Moby Dick is published in the United States, along with Nathanial Hawthorne’s House of Seven Gables. The painting “Washington Crossing the Delaware” is completed by German-American artist Emmanuel Leutze. These books and this painting are generally well-known, but every real American is entitled to their own opinion of their quality, their enjoyability, and what – if anything – each of them means or how they may or may not relate to the schisms leading to war. 

Village PeopleDecember 1851 – The first Y.M.C.A. opens in Boston, Massachusetts. This arguably reflected changing values and social strategies in northern cities – if we were going to talk about values, I mean. Which we won’t. Because… school. So, um… the Village People recorded “Y.M.C.A.” in 1978 and it became a huge disco hit. If you’ve ever been to a live sporting event, you’ve heard this song and watched people do weird things with their arms which they seem to think are related to the song. 

March 1852 – Harriet Beecher Stowe’s best-known book, Uncle Tom’s Cabin, is published. Stowe stated that she wrote this work of anti-slavery in response to the Fugitive Slave Act. It sold 300,000 copies in its first years of publication and is generally reputed to have had a huge impact in both North and South. 

Many people think this book played a major role in the outbreak of war several years later. There’s also a story about Lincoln meeting Stowe and some things he may or may not have said. You should research all available information regarding this book and its impact in order to decide for yourself what role it may or may not have played and whether or not it’s a “good” book. Or ask your clergyman. Or clergyperson. Not that I’m suggesting there’s a god. Or that there’s not. I mean–

*sigh* 

June 1852 – Henry Clay died. This was probably important in how Congress managed their affairs, but I don’t want to say for sure. 

October 1852 – Daniel Webster died. This was also probably important, but again… trying to be neutral here. 

November 1852 – Franklin Pierce, a Democrat, was elected President. Many things happened during his administration which could be interpreted a variety of ways…

Gadsden Purchase1853 – America and Mexico signed the Gadsden Treaty. Vice President William King died. Arctic explorer Elisha Kane ventures farther north than any man has before.

1854 – Franklin Pierce was re-elected. The Kansas-Nebraska Act was passed and great conflict occurs, probably as a result, for reasons related to politics and slavery, but as a public school educator I don’t like to get involved in politics or controversial social issues, so… ask your parents, I guess. 

1855 – William Lloyd Garrison published “Disunion!” in The Liberator and Walt Whitman published Leaves of Grass. There are people who find both of these things signficant in different ways, so you might look into that. It’s complicated. 

1856 – Henry Bessemer invented a process for mass production of steel. John Brown led raids against pro-slavery families in Kansas and five men were beheaded. He became a controversial figure about whom I have absolutely no insight or opinion because – controversy! (I could point you to some articles but we’re really running out of time here, so…) 

1856 – James Buchanan was elected President. 

1857 – The Supreme Court issued their decision in Dred – 

Crap. We’ve got five minutes and we haven’t talked about Harper’s Ferry or the Election of 1860 or Abraham Lincoln. Then again, if we talk more about Lincoln than we have Pierce or Buchanan, that’s suggesting he was more important than they were, which is a political judgment as well as a value judgment. It favors one party’s ideology over the other, and…

Uncle Tom's Cabin

I must apologize, class. Instead of just teaching you the facts, I seem to still be picking and choosing which parts of history to cover. I’ve injected way too many of my own ideas about which things matter and what they mean. I just couldn’t help myself when Uncle Tom’s Cabin came up; it was just so important—

Er… in my opinion. For reasons I should keep to myself, because others disagree. 

Dammit. 

I’ll try to do better tomorrow when we cover the Civil War in a day. I won’t leave anything out or inject my own biases about which battles, people, or ideas were right or wrong or which mattered more than others, or whether ending slavery was a good idea or the war was unpleasant. I’ll just teach you some history. That is, after all, my job – right?

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Seven Reasons You Probably Don’t Suck (For Teachers)

Anya Fights

Well, it’s that time of year. Spring Break has passed – the last landmark of rebootage and rejuvenation. 

Many of us are returning without much idea what we’ll be doing in class this week. Maybe you feel behind again, and have big plans for getting things ‘back on track.’ Or maybe all that stuff you were gonna do better this year has already kinda fizzled, and you’re just hanging on until term ends. Some of you are excited about seeing your kids again – which is weird. Don’t get me wrong, I’m happy for you… but it’s still seriously weird. 

So maybe you’re optimistic, or maybe you’re sad break is over, or maybe…

Maybe you don’t actually know anymore. Maybe you had the best intentions ever, but when it’s quiet and you’re alone, you wonder…

Oh god, do I suck at this? Maybe I’m not cut out to be a teacher. I mean, I like it sometimes… often, really. I just thought I’d be better at it. It’s like I can’t quite… they just aren’t… I wish… *sigh*.

I get it. Whatever variation taunts you, I hear you. I don’t really do nurturing or warm fuzzies, but I am a fan of reality – so let’s be candid for a moment, shall we?

You don’t suck at this teaching thing. 

I mean, it’s possible, I suppose. Some teachers do. But most of the ones who DO suck don’t realize or care that they suck. They certainly don’t read education blogs hoping for insight or inspiration. So it’s very, very unlikely that you suck. 

Buffy Is The PlanStatistics say, in fact, that you’re probably pretty good. Once you control for poverty and upbringing and factors well-beyond your control, the reality is that most American public school teachers are at least adequate, and many are quite impressive much of the time. If this is your first year, you’re probably not as good as you will be in two more; if this is your twentieth, it’s possible you’ve lost some of the passion of your first fifteen. But overall, I suspect you’re a miracle worker every day and simply don’t see it.

Ridiculous – you’d know if you were any good, right? You’d feel it. You’d… you’d be happier, wouldn’t you? 

Maybe. But not necessarily. I’d like to respectfully suggest seven reasons good teachers feel like failures – especially this time of year. Feel free to add your own thoughts below. 

1. Your elected leaders despise you. 

If you live in Oklahoma, or somewhere similarly enraptured by Social Darwinism and state-subsidized elitism, you’ve already endured years of passive-aggressive chipping away at all you hold dear. Teachers are lazy. Teachers aren’t accountable. Schools are failing. Kids are trapped. Public education is wasteful. It’s atheistic and immoral and corrupting and Socialist. Teachers are incompetent pedophiles and whiney welfare queens. 

It’s tiring. You tell yourself it’s just politics, but over time it leaves you feeling a bit marginalized. That’s not you, honey – that’s them. 

2. Your values are under assault. 

Those principalities and powers don’t just target you, of course. They despise your students for being different colors, coming from different cultures, speaking different languages, having different faiths, or sexualities, or even just different interests and abilities. You decide every day to treat your kids as if their value is innate. You carry on as if all of them deserve opportunity, challenge, enlightenment, and basic dignity – no matter how straight, white, boring, or Protestant you yourself may be. That makes you a problem. 

We Have Done The Impossible

Statistically, the folks next door probably voted against you and your kids. So did most of the people in your small group at church. Most of your students’ parents voted against you and the skills and the knowledge you’re trying to instill in their child so they can function in a diverse and challenging world. It offsets a whole lotta Starbucks gift cards if you let yourself think about it too long. 

These are tough times to be a believer in public education. Or the equal value of all men. Or common decency. 

But here’s the thing, sweets – the majority is wrong. They’ve let fear and resentment trump the better angels of their nature. Like their forebears a century-and-a-half ago, they think they’ll find strength and clarity in pulling away from what America can and should be. They’ve idealized a past that never existed for most, and at the moment they’re twisting and blaming and striking and rationalizing while you stand there stuck on all-men-are-created-equal and the-pursuit-of-individual-happiness and such. It sets up a glaring national cognitive dissonance, and they resent you for it. 

The majority may find their way back, or they may not, but their blindness and thinly-veiled desperation doesn’t make you a bad person or a bad teacher. It makes you a holdout – a rebel, even. It makes you Neville Longbottom, Mal Reynolds, or Piggy insisting on holding the conch shell. It makes you a bringer of light in a fallen world.

They are not the arbiters of suck, I assure you.

3. Kids can be a pain in the @$$. 

We’re so often our students’ primary defenders that it leaves us little opportunity to express legitimate frustrations with the little turds when they’re being idiots. 

Of course I love my kids and of course I’ll fight for their right to exist and flourish in this murky world. That doesn’t mean they don’t wear me out. That doesn’t mean they’re not complete dillweeds from time to time. 

And yet…

Luna Lovegood on Feeling Alone18% failed their common assessment; what can YOU do differently? Absenteeism is up; what can YOU do better? Some demographics are being disciplined out of proportion to others; what are YOU doing wrong? How can YOU reach more kids? How can YOU solve more problems? How can YOU meet more needs? What are YOU doing to modernize or personalize or gamify your curriculum? Why did YOU give little Bobo that ‘F’? How can YOU get more parents involved? What are YOU doing about global warming? Nuclear disarmament? World hunger? Transgender issues? That one computer mouse that keeps getting stuck? WHY HAVEN’T YOU FIXED IT ALL YET?!?!

Sometimes your kids suck. Sometimes their parents suck. Sometimes your administration sucks, your state sucks, or the universe sucks, and it makes your day suck. 

Obviously, once we’ve acknowledged the things that are OUT of our control, we have a professional and ethical responsibility to consider everything IN our control we could try differently. It’s never OK to just blame the kid, or the parent, or the system, and call it a day.  

But that’s different than taking it all on yourself as your fault and your responsibility. If you’re doing all you can reasonably do, then you don’t suck, whatever the outcome. 

4. School is stupid. 

The setup under which most of us work is antiquated and not at all conducive to individualized learning or going above and beyond pedagogically. Most of you receive students in blocks of time throughout the day with limited resources and no control over who is or isn’t in which clump or what their individual priorities or interests might be. 

Neville AgainYou keep finding ways to make it work. You keep finding ways to reach as many as you can. When you can’t, it’s not because you suck – it’s because the system simply isn’t set up in a way that benefits most kids individually – it’s set up in the cheapest way possible that still kinda teaches kids in bulk. 

5. No one understands what you actually do. 

Single people think they know how marriage should work, but they don’t. They can’t; it’s just not possible. And just because I’m married doesn’t mean I understand your marriage. There are too many variables. Too many factors. 

People without kids often think they know how they’d handle this or that child in whatever situation, but they don’t. Spawn rarely work the way you think they should, and you can’t return them, so you’re stuck. Being a parent doesn’t make me an expert on your family dynamics or how to best raise your kids; I’m sure you’d have been at a loss what to do with mine. 

Teaching is the same way. Everyone thinks they know how it works, or what it’s like, and they don’t. Even other teachers are quick to project their experiences as the universal guide to what everyone else is doing wrong. You can end up feeling very alone if you’re not careful.  

6. Teacher Movies.

Buffy Mouth of Hell

Movies are pretend. Idealized versions of one slice of reality. Those based on real people are particularly dangerous, as they tend to leave out how badly those folks’ lives crashed and burned as a result of doing whatever it was that made them interesting enough to be in the movies. 

Be inspired by pretend teachers all you like, but don’t judge yourself by them. They’re not real. You are, thankfully.

7. Maybe you do actually suck.

I know, I know – I said earlier that you didn’t. But maybe you’ve started to recently. Maybe you’ve gotten tired or frustrated or lazy due to any or all of the things listed above, or any number of other reasons. It happens. 

Smart vs. RightBut you don’t have to suck – not going forward. You’ve had the training, you have (or had) the ideals, you know kinda how it’s supposed to work. So fix it. Try something different. Consult trustworthy peers in your building and ask what’s working for them. Find that administrator who’s not a jerk and let them know you’re looking for ways to improve – they LOVE that stuff. 

If you’re not going to get better, then get out – go get a real job. It’s not like this one is going to make you rich and fulfilled anytime soon. But if there’s still a spark… well, at the risk of being hokey, these kids need you. Society needs you. The educators around you could probably use a boost as well. 

You’re doing the Lord’s work, friend – literally, if that’s your thing, or colloquially if it’s not. Either way, truth has a certain ‘setting people free’ element which is in short supply recently. Knowledge is power, and skills are potential, and you can matter so much if you only decide to. 

Lots of things suck about this fallen world, but you don’t have to. And you probably don’t. 

Prof. Xavier

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Hole In The Wall Education

Computer Hole KidsI’m a bad person.

I’m an idealist with little use for idealists. It’s not personal. I like those I actually know. But their articles, and books, and speeches make me want to break things and yell school-inappropriate yells.

I resent speakers and writers who build their reputations on explaining how amazing children are and could be if these damn teachers would just get out of the way. I’m sure they’re nice people, smarter and probably better traveled than myself. It’s just that what starts as a neat isolated experience becomes a TED Talk, then a doctrine, then a Pink Floyd cover band.

“Hey, teachers! Leave those kids alone!”

Bo-LieveDon’t get me wrong – it’s just peachy keen swell that throwing a few computers in the middle of an impoverished village and making sure no teachers interfere practically guarantees a bunch of eight-year olds will master calculus, cure cancer, and reverse climate change. Here’s to the success of every one of those dusty darlings and even newer, bigger opportunities for them to challenge themselves AND the dominant paradigm. Seriously.

Variations of this theme abound on Twitter, the blogosphere, and administrators’ bookshelves. Hand any teenager an iPad and stop crushing his little spirit with your outdated ways and he’ll learn like the wind. Enough, you fiend – let them love learning!

But I don’t buy it. Not even a little.

I can’t point to research or books with provocative edu-titles. If you really want me to, I’ll try it – I’ll lock my students in my classroom with the two relatively outdated computers available there and come back in May to release them.

Lord of the Flies GraphicMaybe it would be better to do the entire building… eleven hundred freshmen set free to learn with a bank of Dells and no silly adults with their stifling expectations. Imagine the money saved on staff – and computers never take personal days or violate professional dress code!

Forgive me if I don’t anticipate an education revolution as a result. 

My bet is something more akin to Lord of the Flies, although I could be WAY off – it could be more Hunger Games or Clockwork Orange-y. I’m not prescient; I’ve just met teenagers.

It probably doesn’t help that my students have so much else they could do instead of take a self-directed learning journey of personal discovery. The kids in the inspirational anecdotes don’t tend to have an Xboxes, smart phones, cable TV, malls, or meals which include protein.

Remember how entertained you now think you were as a kid with just a cardboard box and some Cheez Whiz for a whole afternoon? That was great, mostly because you had ABSOLUTLEY NOTHING ELSE TO DO. Teeter totters are awesome compared to staring at dirt; they lose some magic compared to Halo: The Arousing. It’s just all so relative. In the land of rotary dial, he with the Atari is king.

But only there.

Self Directed Journey of Discovery LearningI’m not unsympathetic. I get what these writers and speakers are going for. Most are trying to make the very valid point that when we try to cram kids’ heads full of 87-pages of curriculum standards compiled by committees and approved by states to be tested by bubbles, we are unlikely to either fill their buckets OR light their fires.

Our American spawn resist being cajoled into dronehood – which is largely what public ed does and is designed to do.  We do try these days to at least beat them into more CURRENT drone models… it’s just that things in the real world keep changing so fast…

But… technology! ALL LEARNING CAN BE GRAND MATH AUTO

I’m not against online coursework. I know for a fact that it serves a useful function for certain kinds of students in specific situations. But let’s keep a little perspective. 

We’re swept up in the promise of ‘individualized pacing’, intense engagement, and infinite branches of exploration – like the Holodeck or those Divergent serums. One would think educational software must be on the verge of surpassing the major video gaming companies in terms of graphics, storylines, and immersion. (Watch out Elder Scrolls VII – here comes Bioshock Civics: How the Powers of the Executive Branch Have Evolved Commensurate to Expansions in Mass Media!)

Oregon Trail Screen ShotIt’s not.  Remember that Oregon Trail game we were all so excited about a few decades ago? That’s still about as cutting edge as educational games have managed, and that’s not even what most virtual learning is attempting. 

The vast majority of online coursework consists of reading short passages, watching videos, following a few links, then answering multiple choice questions. There may be a little writing. You work alone, and guess at the multiple choice questions as often as necessary to hit 75% or whatever before you move on.

This pedagogy is everything we’ve been fighting against since Horace Mann. Nothing wrong with utilizing textbooks or lectures or video, but a teacher whose class is driven by such things is unlikely to win a Bammy.

To be fair, the more cutting-edge programs let you email your teacher or make a few lame required posts to a ‘discussion group’ from time to time.  Truly this is leaps and bounds beyond my foldables or a good Socratic circle, but Fallout: Populism it is not.

Most learning happens because teachers in rooms keep trying to figure out how to inspire, motivate, cajole, or trick their darlings into learning things the teacher thinks are important even though the 11-year old may not realize it just yet.

Pink Floyd TeacherThere are glaring problems with this system, some within the school’s control and many more without. The biggest problem with the current model is also the most substantial barrier to all this self-directed learning we keep hearing will save us all – state legislatures dictate most of what’s supposed to be “important” and decide how these things will be assessed.

But the absurdity of rigid state mandates doesn’t mean the logical solution is to eliminate all adult guidance regarding essential knowledge or skills. Crazy as it may sound, many good teachers are perfectly capable of finding balances based on the abilities and interests of their kids – some non-negotiables, because hopefully the certified professional knows a few things the pre-teen does not, and some choice for the child regarding what they pursue and how they pursue it.

And if that doesn’t work, we can go back to your plan. But I’m not cleaning up after the pig head on a stick.

{This post is a repeat from many long moons ago. I still mean it, though, or I wouldn’t have chosen it to repost. Duh.}

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