Time to Get Involved – #OKElections16

March 18, 2016June 4, 2023 ~ Blue Cereal ~ 3 Comments

I wanted to compile a short list of talking points, a resource for educators or parents willing to encourage others to get more involved in state elections but unsure what to say. My goal was for it to be succinct, informative, and relatively free of tone and attitude, so as to be more palatable to the masses.

I think it at least ended up relatively informative. Modify tone and length as you see fit.

Please ask your prinicpal if you can have five minutes at the next faculty meeting to discuss getting teachers more involved in the decisions which substantially impact them – AND THEIR KIDS. Discuss it with your department. Email this to friends, neighbors, co-workers – and then follow up with actual conversations.

The goal isn’t to get them to vote for your guy, or agree with you about everything. More educators and thoughtful parents involved in the process will have a positive impact, period. Vote your conscience; it’s the not voting and not having a conscience that’s killing us right now.

See, other than a vigorous sign-carrying from time to time, far too many of us don’t pay attention to the legislation that affects us or the office-holders who – supposedly – represent us in OKC. It can seem time-consuming, confusing, and depressing. We’re busy, and that stuff seems so far away. It’s not like we can DO anything about it, right?

But there are something like 45,000 teachers in Oklahoma. Many of us are married, or have adult children, or siblings in the state, or even, like, friends – meaning an easy 100,000+ voters if we’ll only decide it’s important. Roughly 800,000 people voted in the last statewide election. See the math?

With a little agitating, we can have actual impact this year. We don’t even have to win them all – we just have to be a reliably involved constituency. Right now we’re not. Many legislators – both friend and foe – will tell you that teachers sometimes fuss, but they don’t show up and support candidates who support them. They’ll call and email and gripe, but don’t vote out people who serve their fiscal overlords in ways that hurt our kids. That must change.

We have momentum, starting with an early win in the District 34 Special Election this year. Social media is abuzz. The weirdness of the national campaign has people paying attention, so let’s build on that. Be vocal, be reasonable, be civil – and be informed.

I’m sharing this as someone who avoided state politics for many years. My goal is to make the information as accessible as possible for any of you who perhaps haven’t been as involved as you are now considering. No judgment – we just need your help.

#OKElections16 State Primaries

March 1st was, as you were probably aware, the date of the Presidential Primary in Oklahoma. That’s a whole other descent into madness we won’t worry about here.

Statewide Primaries are on Tuesday, June 28th. This is when we begin the process of choosing who’ll be setting state edu-policy for the next 2 – 4 years. This is when you help choose your party’s nominee for each office serving the district in which you live. Sometimes there will be multiple candidates from the same party running for an office; sometimes not.

Members of the State House of Representatives are elected every two years – every one of them is up for re-election (or not) every time. State Senators are elected every four years, meaning half are up for re-election (or not) each time.

You have until June 3rd to make sure you’re registered to vote in Statewide Primaries. Here’s why that matters…

We really do have Democrats here. Some even hold office. A few are kinda out there, but most are strong supporters of public education. They have limited impact, however, unless there are MORE of them working together. So, if those are your leanings, you need to get involved and vote these folks in. I realize national politics seems a bit futile for lefties in these parts, but you can have a huge impact closer to home.

As to Republicans, the state has quite a range. Primaries are even MORE important on this side of the aisle. They won’t ‘feel the Bern’ on many issues, but some are nicer to public education than others. Don’t take their word for it – they all SAY they support teachers. Figure out who’s been voting for what.

If you care about other issues deeply, that’s great – look at their records on those ALSO. But be realistic about what state legislators CAN and CANNOT actually do. They CAN substantially help or hurt public education, they have great impact on whether or not your grandmother has access to health care, and they come up with all the reasons to keep everyone locked up indefinitely. They make state policy for state-level issues.

Most social issues in the 21st century are shaped by federal legislation and Supreme Court decisions. For better or worse, the North won the Civil War. The 14th Amendment is a thing. All we accomplish by repeatedly passing laws in clear violation of national socio-political realities are expensive lawsuits (remember that budget crisis?) – which the state always loses – and national mockery.

A vote to return to the 19th century is a wasted vote – and that’s before we even address how ethically abhorrent it is to begin with.

But public education IS in their power to improve. Or change. Or destroy.

Any state primary in which no candidate receives a majority of the vote will result in a Primary Runoff election on August 23rd. Only the top two candidates for each disputed office will be on these ballots.

#OKElections16 State Elections

Statewide elections are on the same date – November 8, 2016 – as national elections.

PLEASE DO NOT VOTE STRAIGHT PARTY TICKET when it’s time to fill out your ballot. I’d not presume to tell you who to vote for nationally (well, I would – but not right this second), but it’s SO WORTH TAKING A LITTLE TIME to get to know something about your state and local options.

An Oklahoma Democrat isn’t necessarily the same creature as a California Democrat or a Massachusetts Democrat. Our ‘lefties’ often have strong approval ratings from the NRA, conservative social values, or other traits which would count as ‘crazy right-winger’ in other parts of the country.

As far as Oklahoma Republicans, as I suggested above, there’s quite a range. Some of them are the sorts of bile-spewing demagogues who brand the entire party as haters and nut-jobs, but many are good enough folks genuinely trying to guide the state along the right path, whether we agree on the details or not.

I’ve profiled as many candidates as time allows, and keep a running compilation of current issues in #OklaEd. If these don’t cover what you want to know, you can try several things:

* Several of the top #OklaEd bloggers and news sites cover this stuff regularly. You can subscribe to their blogs, read the stuff that interests you, and easily discard the rest.

* Subscribe to the Tulsa World and/or that Oklahoma City paper that’s not nearly as good. They’ll often have candidate info as election time approaches, and with a subscription you can search past months and years to see if they’ve been in the news before, and for what.

* OpenStates.org is free to use and allows you to easily search for specific legislation or for specific legislators. You can pull up a list of every bill they’ve authored, successful or no, or look at who voted which way for any specific piece of legislation over the past several years. There are topic searches of state legislation as well, so if you’re not sure which bills you’re looking for, you can look at bills involving “education” or other key words.

* OKLegislature.gov is the official website of the State Legislature. Here you can easily find out who your elected officials are, and look over their official profiles. Many have official biographies, some have introductory videos, and most have basic contact information. Some respond to constituents, some don’t – which by itself tells you something, yes?

* If you’re on Facebook, groups like Oklahoma Parents and Educators for Public Education post regular articles and updates and engage in discussions related to public ed. If no one’s talking about your legislative district, bring it up yourself and see what happens.

* If you’re on Twitter, watch for (or search) the hashtags #OklaEd and #OKElections16. We’re pretty free with our opinions.

Between Now and Election Days

Let your elected representatives for your districts KNOW that you support them – and why, or that you DON’T – and why. Be clear, concise, and polite.

Better yet, run yourself. I’m absolutely serious. You’ll work fewer hours for far more money, and have a seat at the table making policy. If not you, talk to your spouse, your favorite principal, or that amazing educator who just retired. I’m telling you, teachers and their people running for state office is a thing this year.

I’ll support you. Many of the legit blogs will, too. Yes, some of the current office-holders have big financial backing from out-of-state, but all that money means little if they can’t get the votes – and their fiscal overlords show little mercy to losers.

This is the year. I can’t tell you what next year will bring, but I can assure you it will be better than it would have if you’ll simply get involved and stay informed. You owe it to yourself, and your state, and your family.

Most of all, cheesy as it is, you owe it to our kids.

Let’s Talk About Choice

February 23, 2016June 4, 2023 ~ Blue Cereal ~ 4 Comments

There’s been a real emphasis recently on parent choice in regard to public schooling. Apparently, parents know better than anyone what’s best for their child and what sort of education is most appropriate for their individual needs.

Of the many pro-voucher arguments out there, this seems to be the one state leadership has decided on as their primary talking point. I must confess, I’m a bit bewildered when they became such fans.

When parents began opting out of standardized testing because they didn’t think it was best for their children, state leaders didn’t seem too excited about parent choice. Many were annoyed, others apathetic. The overall tone seemed to indicate that these stupid parents were just causing trouble – probably because they’d been led astray by radical bloggers and corrupt superintendents. I certainly don’t recall many legislators applauding for these wise parents and their use of choice.

When parents protested that their third grade children were being brutalized by high-stakes reading tests, facing retention and large scarlet ‘F’s on their chests as a result, state leaders absolutely loathed parent choice. A feisty group of elected representatives finally managed to change the rules enough that parents at least have SOME voice in whether it would be ‘best for their child’ to move on to fourth grade, and Governor Fallin VETOED it – because what do parents know about standards and accountability and children?

The veto was overridden, but at the cost of a ‘sunset provision’ on parental involvement – meaning the same people crying for ‘parent choice’ for their chosen sliver of the population are still itching to eliminate it for the rest.

My son would have benefited greatly from getting out of the six-hour day, the old-school academic core-you-to-death structure in which he was bound, but state law said no. Every child, regardless of ability, interest, background, or potential, has to have X-number of required butt-in-seat hours and be crammed full of the same tired basics that state leadership has mandated as sacred and holy for all kids, for all time.

I wanted desperately to give him something more practical, outdoors, or vo-tech heavy MUCH earlier in his schooling, but I didn’t have that choice. NO parent has that choice. The state knows what’s best, and we don’t – that’s why they make the laws and set the harsh penalties if I don’t force my kid through them, no matter how bad for him or her it might be.

The anti-vaxxers have gained a little leeway in Oklahoma, but by and large have very little choice whether or not their child will be immunized before heading off to school. Why don’t we give these parents choice? Freedom to do what’s best for their kids, who might have different needs?

Seat-belt laws are about as anti-choice as it gets. They are the ultimate statement of belief that too many parents don’t have the first god-given CLUE what’s best for their kids. They’re too stupid to even buckle them in without the threat of fiscal penalty. Parent choice? Are you kidding?

I hesitate to even bring up the demonization of smokers – tell THOSE parents they have the right to decide what’s best for their kids or their community when they light up. You’ll get either a sardonic chuckle or a pop in the nose for being a smart-ass. (Sorry to blur that there issue, Jay.)

Nor do they have much real choice what their kids are allowed to eat at school. The state mandates the most awful fat-free gluten-free flavor-free color-free slop, boosting the sales of Flamin’ Hot Cheetos far above anything legislation could have mandated had they so desired. Sure, you can send lunch with them, as long as you have the sort of lifestyle allowing you to pack it each morning, and as long as it doesn’t have to be hot, or cold, or mixed, or preserved in any way throughout the day.

Even PTSA Pizza Day now means special everything-free crust and no toppings of any kind because Michelle Obama and Jason Nelson think kids are fat. None of this screams parent choice (although it’s a wonderful example of unintended consequences – the kids eat far worse than they did before because we’ve made the standard options so unpalatable).

Spanking my child is only a choice if I keep it a dirty little secret.

Deciding that my 8-year old or sleeping infant is fine in the car for five minutes on a nice day with the doors locked but windows cracked while I run into CVS to grab their prescription isn’t parent choice anymore – it’s a call to the police and DHS.

Same for sending them to play in the park across the street without Zuckerberg-level security. I know it’s safe, the neighborhood knows it’s safe, all available statistics say it’s safe, but the need for us to remain in perpetual panic and fear so as to be more easily controlled says parents simply don’t GET that kind of CHOICE.

What’s left?

Oh, yes – the vouchers.

IF I’m an involved enough parent to understand the process and go through the paperwork, and IF I can afford the thousands of extra out-of-pocket dollars required to actually GO to a private school, vouchers or no, and IF my child can meet the requirements of the institutions at which these ESA Gift-Cards are useable, and IF I have the time and fiscal resources to get them there and back every day, and IF I can pay for any necessary materials, supplies, instruments, uniforms, or whatever else may be required, and IF my child is a perfect fit academically and, er… “culturally” with the school, THEN I have CHOICE.

Equity and access on paper while upper class white folks are the only ones with real options in practice? Shocking. What a strange new problem to encounter.

As a bonus, the more times “choice” is bandied about in the rhetoric, the easier it is to “blame the victim” when they don’t qualify to be “choosers.”

Once again we have edu-slation claiming to serve all the little children, when the only thing it’s really designed to serve is more state-sanctioned ‘white flight’. That sort of misdirection and shameless hypocrisy is why so many of us seem to be in a perpetual snit. We’re trying to wake up Citizen Doe before the fire reaches her bedroom, but she’s fast asleep dreaming of the Gay Muslims trying to take her guns from the bathroom stall next door.

If common education weren’t being methodically dismantled to begin with, I wouldn’t personally be fussing nearly as much as my smarter, better-looking peers in #OklaEd. You wanna cull the supposed cream and hide them away at Word of Faith of Hope of Grace until they’re old enough to join Hydra leadership? Live it up. It’s still wrong, and it’s not good for either group of children, but whatever.

I don’t mind choice as such. But if we feel the slightest obligation to mean anything we say in the political realm anymore, and choice is your thing, then let’s provide choices – lots of them – to ALL parents, and ALL kids, in both public and private scenarios. Let’s set loose that “free market of ideas” of which conservatives used to be so proud, and support it until the playing field at least looks level – even if it means risking possible success by a few kids NOT on our ‘chosen’ list.

RELATED POSTS: The Voucher Opportunity / Hair of the Blog (OKEducationTruths)

RELATED POSTS: #OklaEd Legislators are Sweet on ESA’s / Who’s Standing In The Dark? (A View From The Edge)

RELATED POSTS: 10th Amendment & #OklaEd / Do ESAs Pass the Lemon Test? (Idealistically Realistic)

End #OklaEd

February 15, 2016June 4, 2023 ~ Blue Cereal ~ 5 Comments

We’ve been going about this all wrong.

Oklahoma’s political leadership is NOT going to support public education. There won’t be increases to funding, or teacher raises of any real substance. Legislation in the next decade will be just like legislation in the past decade – more limits, more measuring, more changing the rules as often as possible. More hostility, more red tape, more blame piled on schools for spending so much time and energy on that exact same red tape.

Why fight it anymore?

It’s not like it matters if we get 60%, 70%, even 80% of the public behind us. Calls to legis concerning ESAs were something like 4-to-1 against and it still went through committee. Once the Blaine Amendment is repealed and the State Constitution changed so that the OK Supreme Court can no longer declare anything unconstitutional, it’s pretty much over anyway.

And yet we keep burning up those keyboards and spiking that blood pressure to accomplish… what?

Not much.

Thus my opening realization. We’ve been going about this all wrong.

Maybe they’re right.

Maybe private schools ARE better at everything. There are certainly a number of very impressive institutions around the Tulsa area, and I assume the same thing is true over in OKC.

Maybe choice IS good. Maybe competition spurs excellence, just like with fast food chains or cable television programming. Maybe we’ve been fighting to keep education stuck in the 20th century, and it’s time to move into the 19th.

Maybe vouchers DO actually save money – parents get their 80% of current per-student allocation and the rest is magical gravy. According to those unending ESA talking points, the more kids who leave public schooling, the better off the remaining children ARE as a result! How exciting!

And here we are, blogging and fussing and kicking and screaming to prevent that kind of progress. Progress that will make so many legislators happy. Progress that will save the state SO much money.

Progress that will be SO good for ALL of the children.

Why keep public schools at all?

Assuming our elected leadership has the slightest idea what they’re talking about, any child stuck in a public school is being undereducated and underserved. Parents who CARE take their child and their edu-gift card and shop for something better. Parents who don’t… well, their kid is stuck in all of these sucky schools staffed by whiney unionized teachers and bloated administrations who won’t even voluntarily consolidate.

So let’s do what’s best for ALL kids. Let’s end public schooling altogether.

Every student’s family will have receive an immediate voucher to spend at a much better school of their choice. Religious, secular, big, small – whatever. The free market is god, after all.

Granted, this could be a bit disruptive in the short term, but I have no doubt that the power of capitalism will overcome all difficulties. Religious institutions of all varieties will step up to claim their share – evangelical churches as well as more orthodox denominations, Catholics as well as Jews. The Islamic community will certainly be ready with top quality options quicker than most, and the Buddhists will presumably make less fuss than, well… anyone.

And remember those zany atheists who wanted to build that devil bench on the capitol grounds next to the Ten Commandments? They’ll JUMP at the chance to have their own SCHOOL! Their science scores will be AMAZING!

Businesses of all sorts are welcome as well. Pearson, Holt-McDougal, and any number of Computer Bank Academies – probably the most cost-effective of the bunch. They’ll take all comers without fear or filters, knowing that one of their own primary arguments for ESAs is that private schools succeed because of FREEDOM. The kind of freedom which we’ll finally let ring, unshackled by the expectations and accountability previously crippling public schools.

I’m sure there will be some growing pains for the first few weeks, but the important thing is that we’re finally making progress as a state – for the children. Individualized instruction. Choice. Excellence through capitalism – all while saving the state millions.

I confess I’m not entirely sure who’s most likely to pick up the substantial number of students whose parents aren’t overly active in helping make such decisions. I’m curious what new strategies we’ll see in play to accomodate students well below grade level or manifesting emotional or behavioral issues.

It’s called “the invisible hand,” after all, because there’s no telling what unexpected wonders will unfold among the highest needs populations, or transient students, or kids on IEPs, or anyone who’s not white or Asian. I honestly can’t imagine…

But I guess that’s the same sort of uncertainty regarding market forces that’s been making me part of the problem rather than part of the solution, isn’t it? I need to let that go and believe (hashtag trustfall).

Of course, not everyone will so easily accept that we’d be willing to make this sacrifice. They’ll want to do things gradually, burdened by compromises and half-steps. We may hear voices not known for defending public ed extolling the essential role it’s always played and lamenting its loss – that’s what you do at funerals, after all.

That’s why the onus is on US to do what’s RIGHT, whatever equivocating our political leadership suddenly manifests. This is where #oklaed, so proud of doing what’s best for KIDS rather than what’s convenient for US, must step up. No fear, no hesitation, no selfish second-thoughts.

We’ll all quit.

Together, at once. Every classroom teacher, bus driver, librarian, nurse, counselor, janitor, cafeteria lady, building principal, district secretary, all the way up to those way-too-many district superintendents, everywhere in the state. We leave for Spring Break as scheduled, and announce that no one – not one single educator – will be returning.

This isn’t a strike. We don’t WANT anything for ourselves. There are no demands. We’re doing this for the children, so they can be free. We’re sacrificing our stubborn, unionized, lower-end-of-A-F ways and humbly confessing that we were wrong – state leadership is right.

The kids will be better off this way – so get those vouchers cranking.

Sure, a handful of us will end up working for the various private schools taking our place. Many will go out-of-state where we’d be already, if we had any self-respect at all.

And yet… it won’t be easy for most, such a big change in such a short time frame. But setting aside our own wants and needs to do what’s best for children is kinda what we do. Surely you’ve noticed our collective martyr complex?

The dramatic improvement across the range of students – from the pastiest engineering lad with awkward speech patterns to the most impoverished student of color in the heart of the city – will make it worth a little discomfort and a few years of Republican smugness as they save the future once again.

You might assume I’m using hyperbole, or trying to make a sarcastic point, but I’m totally not. Not this time.

Start talking to your coworkers, superiors, and parents NOW. This has to be ALL or NOTHING.

I understand your hesitation. It’s terrifying. Huge. Many of you aren’t sure what you’ll even do if you’re not holding back the children with your unionized antediluvianism.

Stop being so selfish! Smarter, more caring people than you are TRYING to let children have CHOICE, and a BETTER EDUCATION! Get out of their way!

All the way out of their way. And let’s see what happens.

Jonah’s Education

February 2, 2016June 4, 2023 ~ Blue Cereal

Those of you who are not Sunday-go-to-meetin’ people may have to excuse me for a moment. So might those of you who are, but who live it like a calling rather than wielding it like a cudgel.

I am by no means a preacher of the gospel. But if the powers-that-be are going to sling Bible around in defense of stockpiling weapons and demeaning the weak and the weary, I don’t feel too guilty suggesting that parts of it actually promote enlightenment, children, and self-examination.

With that in mind, I’d like to talk about Jonah. Yes, the one who was swallowed by a fish.

While my personal theology includes a very real Jonah and a very large fish, you’re welcome to distance yourself from such orthodoxy and think of it as a parable or fable of some sort. Whether literal or figurative, it made it into the part of the Bible most evangelicals believe – “all of it.” That gives the story some validity either way – at least among those I wish would stop blaming Jesus for their own horrible political leadership.

Jonah, as the story goes, was given an assignment by God with a big ‘G’ (or Yahweh with an omni-sized ‘Y’, if you prefer). “Go to Nineveh and explain a few things so they won’t end up destroyed.”

It wasn’t a particularly vague command, or one of those “does He mean X or did He really mean Y?” situations. He’s not a Greek Oracle – Jonah’s God was stern and direct, striking people down for minor infractions and such. Jonah understood exactly what he expected was to do.

But he didn’t want to.

Why?

There are various explanations, but the most consistent and plausible is that he didn’t think much of Nineveh. It was going to be a lot of work to “straighten them out.” They were yucky, and did bad things, and weren’t raised properly.

He would presumably have been quite willing to go preach to a cleaner, nicer nation – one full of happy white home-schooled children or properly disciplined Methodists whose parents read to them when they were little. And maybe that was the kind of thing Jonah normally did before, or would do after, the events recorded in this tale – we don’t really know.

But Jonah didn’t like Ninevehians, and we can’t – in all fairness – entirely blame him. They’d made some poor choices and probably didn’t deserve his efforts towards their enlightenment.

So he runs.

Not a great move, given the whole ‘Omniscient God’ thing, but we don’t always do what we know is reasonable or right. Sometimes we’re slaves to our biases and fears.

Lesson one from Jonah’s little escapade is that even when we have some pretty good reasons to do the wrong thing, it’s still the wrong thing.

Lesson two is that when we neglect our professional responsibilities, we’re not the only ones affected. While Jonah dozes deep in the bowels of his getaway ship, everyone else on board is damn near killed by the resulting tempest.

Even after they figure out the problem is Jonah and toss him over, that doesn’t bring back the cargo they lost trying to ride out the storm or the contents of their stomachs recently shared with the sea. Jonah left behind a mess, personally and fiscally.

Next comes the fish part. Jonah repents – at least temporarily – and is vomited onto land. This is a nice little grave’n’rebirth image, albeit smellier than most. Lesson three, if we’re to keep it temporal, is along the lines of “sometimes you need a good kick in the pants to do the right thing.”

What I’m most interested in, though, comes after Jonah’s rebirth on the beach.

God calls again and Jonah goes to Nineveh this time. It took several days to travel through the whole city, and while the story doesn’t record many specifics, it seems reasonable to think he spent much of that time explaining how things truly worked to those he encountered. Whether he was teaching or exhorting or complaining about life inside a fish, he said enough to get the king’s attention and the whole city ended up in sackcloth and ashes, repenting of their evil ways.

I can’t prove, Biblically, that he taught and challenged them during these three days. It’s entirely possible he just kinda walked around and maybe hung out at Applebee’s chatting up the wait staff over the weird drink options they keep pushing.

But it makes more sense to imagine him – however begrudgingly – sharing the truth as he understood it and telling them stories of past nations in comparable situations. Once it started to click, it caught on.

Lesson Four, then, is that sometimes yucky people are the hungriest for attention and enlightenment – for someone to care enough to challenge them to reconsider their ways. Lesson Five is that sometimes you don’t need to win everyone to be effective – you have to win enough to change the momentum of the whole.

The part we often forget – because it’s awkward and hard to explain – is that the story ends with Jonah annoyed and pouting because his teaching was effective. He hates that he devoted his energy and resources to helping “those” people, who ended up better off as a result.

It’s hard to spin this positively in the children’s books devoted to this otherwise nifty yarn. It’s kind of a jerk way to behave.

Jonah finds himself a spot outside of Nineveh where he can keep an eye on the city from a distance and see if maybe they’ll be destroyed after all. He tends to his own comfort, and God helps him out by miracle-growing a big leafy plant overhead to provide a little extra shade.

Prior to his visit, he could at least have argued that Nineveh deserved whatever they got. They’d made bad choices and with those often come natural consequences.

Now, however, Nineveh was on a much better track. They were doing what cities needed to do to stay in good standing with the Big Guy, and presumably peace and prosperity were coming their way (that’s how things tended to work in the Old Testament). Now any illusion that Jonah’s mindset was exclusively about behavior or choices is dispelled.

He just doesn’t like these people. At all. He kinda wishes they’d just die, whether they’re doing everything he could possibly ask or not. Sure, his God loves them, blah blah blah, but why should he have to endure them?

Lesson Six, appropriately enough, is that people – even God’s chosen messengers – can be bitter and small and ugly and wrong. Some of it’s culture; much of it’s choice.

Lesson Seven is from Jonah’s God, who took away the tree and upped the discomfort level for Mr. Sulky. “You’re mad about losing some of the perks and comforts you never really built or earned to begin with – temporal things of limited value. I’m more concerned about actual people – lots of them – who don’t even know how much they need education and understanding.”

And the story ends abruptly.

It’s possible Jonah learned a thing or two about empathy and continued his calling with a better attitude and a changed heart. Then again, maybe he ran for office and ended up peddling bad education policy across Oklahoma – forever fleeing Nineveh without regard for the consequences.

Top Ten Education Myths (Part Two)

January 22, 2016June 4, 2023 ~ Blue Cereal ~ 1 Comment

In a previous post, I counted down the first half of my Top 10 Teacher Myths. I broke the post in half partly due to the length, but I also wanted to solicit #11FF thoughts on the remaining five.

It was perhaps cruel to leave you waiting for Part Two. Fear not, however, my Eleven Faithful Followers – our long national nightmare is over. Here are my Top 5 Teacher Myths:

#5 – Those who can, do; those who can’t, teach. I didn’t want to use this one because I thought it was too archaic. After reader feedback, however, it’s clearly not – they find it flung about like primate poo whenever education is discussed.

Here’s a simple way to dispel this lamest of illusions. You non-teachers out there, choose whatever it is you’re best at – doing taxes, working on teeth, selling dishwashers, trading stock… whatever.

Now go teach it to 30 teenagers at a time who are there against their will. One hour a day, five groups a day. Continue until 90% of them can pass a multiple choice test made by people who don’t do what you do – the taking of which is nothing like doing your actual thing.

Those who can, teach; those who can’t, can kiss my-

Sorry. A tad bitter.

#4 – Teachers aren’t in it for the money (so abuse them at will and why pay them at all?) It’s true most of us didn’t sign up in order to tap into unlimited wealth and fame – but this is a false dichotomy. It presumes there are only two types of careers in the world – narcissistic, money-hungry, and exploitative, or caring, selfless, and would rather not get paid at all.

Nonsense.

Even those pushing for teacher raises usually miss the rhetorical mark. We don’t need better teacher pay so that we can draw the ‘best people’ to the profession (although it might help with those already IN the profession who’ve fled to surrounding states). We need better teacher pay so that those called to the profession – the ones on their way to becoming the best people for it – can pursue that calling and still make their car payment and feed their family.

It’s not the NHL – we’re not trying to secure a right-shooting defenseman without hitting our salary cap. We’re trying to scrape together enough that those willing and able to serve without riches or glory can do so.

Duh.

#3 – The Number One Factor in a child’s education is the quality of his or her teacher.

No it’s not. Teachers matter, but parents matter more. Poverty matters more. Upbringing, and ZIP code, and culture, and home life, and all sorts of complicated things schools can barely impact, matter more.

Lots more.

We wish they didn’t, because we want to believe we can fix it all by force of will and a dash of talent. But the issues are bigger and deeper and more complex than any number of inspirational memes can solve.

That being said, none of this is an excuse for educators. God grant me the serenity, and all that. Step up and teach as if you ARE the most important factor in their worlds – as if you and you alone stand between them and destruction.

I mean, if you’re particularly concerned with reality – boy, did YOU choose the wrong profession!

#2 – Such and such kids will learn anyway / succeed anyway / be fine no matter how big their classes or who teaches them.

When confronted with shrinking budgets, it’s tempting to pack the ‘honors’ kids into the fewest possible sections in order to maintain manageable class sizes for the rest. When not every faculty member is a superstar, it perhaps makes sense to assign stronger teachers to those most likely to get you on the ‘needs improvement’ list – leaving the ‘good kids’ with the ‘leftover’ teachers.

Whatever arguments may be made for such maneuvering, we salve our consciences by proclaiming that ‘those kids will learn anyway’ – as if they’re fully developed, self-starting little learning machines.

Ridiculous. Maybe they won’t be getting into serious discipline trouble, or failing their end-of-the-year exams, but the suggestion that any subset of children will learn and grow the same amount whether we’re even in the building or not is insulting – and blatantly false.

The ‘best’ students – academically, behaviorally, whatever – need to be pushed and challenged and understood and driven just like any other kid. Often they need it more than others, being the least likely to have experienced meaningful challenge or engagement before.

We’d like to keep our bottom 20% out of prison, but we’ll need tomorrow’s leaders and world-changers to know and be able to do stuff, too. Thinking creatively, chasing truth alone or in groups, the value of mistakes and resolve – these aren’t genetic traits; they’re inculcated by great teachers.

Do what you must to handle difficult logistics, but let’s not coat it in prevarication just so we’ll feel better.

#1 – If you’ll just do X, your students will Y – flip the class, eliminate grades, ask about their feelings, model enthusiasm, make it about the kids, make connections to real life, etc.

This is number one AND the one we most inflict on ourselves. Every time someone has a new idea, or strategy, or approach, and it works for them, it becomes a silver bullet for all times, all teachers, and all situations.

Why would we even begin to think that could be true?

I’ve learned much from teachers who ‘flip the lesson’ – I think it’s a great idea in many circumstances, and I’d have never thought of it. I have plenty to say about how we treat our kids from day to day, and how that impacts their willingness and ability to learn. And if taking out all the desks gives you a jump start to learnify your lil’ darlings, more power to you!

But there’s no Holy Grail we’ve simply missed for two hundred years. There’s no secret which, once unleashed, will change everything for everybody and finally solve the great educational crises of our day.

That’s silly.

It becomes destructive when we convince struggling teachers or ambitious administrators that they must ignore everything their eyes, ears, and guts are telling them and DO THE FINALLY RIGHT THING until the MAGIC HAPPENS. Every time some pedagogical potentate in a bow tie writes a book the superintendent likes or a couple of principals have a particularly good conference weekend in Vegas, they think leadership suddenly means they can mandate the #$%& out of something and all will be solved.

Great ideas are great ideas. Important discussions are important discussions. Keep sharing them, and having them, and trying them. But stop trying to build pedagogical vending machines – insert idea here, win improved test scores, or maybe a tearful thanks from Lil’ Enrique!

OK, that’s it – that’s what I’ve got. What did I leave out? What would you change? I look forward to hearing more from you.

Who knows? I might like your ideas better and revise the whole thing in a later post so I can take credit for them. Now THAT’S a thing teachers actually DO.

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